Finally Friday #5

Oh it's been such a busy week - foxes, geese and all sorts of human visitors (we're not really a fan of them). And then Mommy has been working late at work, so she hasn't had any time to help us visit all our friends! Not one of our better weeks.


So we're looking forward to the weekend, just relaxing and hanging out with Mommy and Daddy. Maybe even a little more of that fresh nip!

- Jake

Practical Thursday Part Two

Here's the next poem of Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats. This one is a bit scary, as good pirate stories often are - and Growltiger isn't the nicest kitty, but it's still a good story. The good news is all the pirates we know are so much nicer!

(Also there are a few words that are old fashioned and no longer politically acceptable, but Mommy felt that it was better to leave the poem intact.)

GROWLTIGER'S LAST STAND

Growltiger was a Bravo Cat, who travelled on a barge:
In fact he was the roughest cat that ever roamed at large.
From Gravesend up to Oxford he pursued his evil aims,
Rejoicing in his title of 'The Terror of the Thames'.

His manners and appearance did not calculate to please;
His coat was torn and seedy, he was baggy at the knees;
One ear was somewhat missing, no need to tell you why,
And scowled upon a hostile world from one forbidding eye.

The cottagers of Rotherhithe knew something of his fame;
At Hammersmith and Putney people shuddered at his name.
They would fortify the hen-house, lock up the silly goose,
When rumor ran along the shore: GROWLTIGER'S ON THE LOOSE!

Woe to the weak canary, that fluttered from it's cage;
Woe to the pampered Pekinese, that faced Growltiger's rage;
Woe to the bristly Bandicoot, that lurks on foreign ships,
And woe to any Cat with whom Growltiger came to grips!

But most of Cats of foreign race his hatred had been vowed;
To Cats of foreign name and race no quarter was allowed.
The Persian and the Siamese regarded him with fear -
Because it was a Siamese had mauled his missing ear.

Now on a peaceful summer night, all nature seemed at play,
The tender moon was shining bright, the barge at Molesey lay.
All in the balmy moonlight it lay rocking in the tide -
And Growltiger was disposed to show his sentimental side.

His bucko mate, GRUMBUSKIN, long since had disappeared,
For to the Bell at Hampton he had gone to wet his beard;
And his bosun, TUMBLEBRUTUS, he too had stol'n away -
In the yard behind the Lion he was prowling for his prey.

In the forepeak of the vessel Growltiger sate alone,
Concentrating his attention on the Lady GRIDDLEBONE.
And his raffish crew were sleeping in their barrels and their bunks -
As the Siamese came creeping in their sampans and their junks.

Growltiger had no eye or ear for aught but Griddlebone,
And the Lady seemed enraptured by his manly baritone,
Disposed to relaxation, and awaiting no surprise -
But the moonlight shone reflected from a hundred bright blue eyes.

And closer still and closer the sampans circled round,
And yet from all the enemy there was not heard a sound.
The lovers sang their last duet, in danger of their lives -
For the foe was armed with toasting forks and cruel carving knives.

Then GILBERT gave the signal to his fierce Mongolian horde;
With a frightful burst of fireworks the Chinks they swarmed aboard.
Abandoning their sampans, and their pullaways and junks,
They battened down the hatches on the crew within their bunks.

Then Griddlebone she gave a screech, for she was badly skeered;
I am sorry to admit it, but she quickly disappeared.
She probably escaped with ease, I'm sure she was not drowned -
But serried ring of flashing steel Growltiger did surround.

The ruthless foe pressed forward, in stubborn rank on rank;
Growltiger to his vast surprise was forced to walk the plank.
He who a hundred victims had driven to the drop,
At the end of all his crimes was forced to go ker-flip, ker-flop.

Oh there was joy in Wapping when the news flew through the land;
At Maidenhead and Henley there was dancing on the strand.
Rats were roasted whole at Brentford, and at Victoria Dock,
And a day of celebration was commanded in Bangkok.

A Visitor

Um, Shade - I think you managed to scare that fox pretty good, cause she's here!


Mommy saw our visitor this morning, from the kitchen window (which is why the picture isn't very good - it's through the screen). Mommy said we couldn't go out unless someone was home to watch over us - but Daddy let us out this afternoon anyway. So I enjoyed my afternoon out and about - until Daddy and I saw that intruder. At which point I chased her off up the driveway!! I don't think that Fox will be back any time soon with such a tough-a** tortie around!

Daddy called Mommy to tell her the story and (after Mommy yelled at Daddy A LOT for letting me out) Mommy said that apparently I'm more of a "Dumb-A** Tortie" than a tough-a** tortie!

And I think it's safe to say that we won't be going out by ourselves much for a while.

-Pearl

**UPDATE** Daddy didn't give Mommy all the story till just this morning, apparently he left out the part where I stalked and chased off a Canada Goose (which as we all know are pretty big and mean). I think Mommy was way more upset about that, because the geese are always around and they are much braver than the fox. But I can not be stopped (well, except for not being let out, that'll stop me)!

Terrier Terror Tuesday

Jake: George, look what you did to my spiffy new birthday toy!


George: It's not my fault, it was in my room! Mommy says that if you guys leave your toys in my room that it's not my fault.

Jake: Well I didn't leave it in there, I don't even go in your room unless Daddy it in there.

George: Well, it was there, so I did what I do - sorry!

Jake: Sheesh, what is it with sisters lately!

-Jake and George

ManCat Rule Monday

If your sister is making fun of you for not wanting to go out, you should smack her from under the door!


- Jake

Thank You Kitties!

All you kitties made my day! So many kitties stopped by to wish me a happy birthday, the Hotties brought over some nip cookies, the Crew brought over some tuna juice and nip - it turned into quite the party!

Then the spectacular Maggy, Zoey and Zoolatry Human made me this super birthday greeting!



And then my wonderful LadyCat Queen Snickers sent me this!

(Wow-wee, a beautiful kitty popping out of a fish cake - I nearly fainted!)

And then the beautiful Queen Snickers and I hit the blogosphere and went to Gretchen's Tea Party along with all the other birthday and gotcha day parties (did you know that yesterday was Willow's Gotcha Day?). I think we make a pretty good looking couple!



And as it turns out, Mommy didn't forget my birthday! It turns out that she had all the presents in the cabinet where I wouldn't find them - sneaky Mommy. She also came through on the extra stinky goodness for dinner too :-)

The best part was a special treat - Fresh Nip (if you guys haven't tried this stuff you you really gotta)!!!! This is one of the few pictures that Mommy got before I tried to steal it away and drag it down the hall (seriously this is good stuff)!



I also got some new feather-butt toys and temptations, but I'm all about that nip (Mommy is going to have to hid that if she wants to plant it in the ground)! So I guess it was a good birthday after all!

- Jake

Knock Knock

Hey Pearl, I've got a joke for you!

Well, I'm kind of busy Bert, but ok, what is it?

Knock, Knock!

Who's there?

Puss!

Puss who?

Puss-ibly you could climb that tree?!


Why yes Bert, I can!


Hey Mom, I've got a knock knock joke for you.

Oh yeah, Jake - what is it?

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Jake

Jake, who?

Jake, your cat who's 6th birthday is today and you forgot all about it!!!!!!!!

Oh Jake, I didn't forget your birthday! It's just that we agreed that you guys were going to post a knock knock joke for Camie's Kitties' Fund Raiser!

All right Mom, but there had better be some presents and serious stinky goodness later on.

There will be big guy, don't worry.

Well, I'm just going to sulk over here till I get some cool birthday stuff - harumph!



It looks like other kitties (Gandalf & Grayson, Auntie Stinkie, Gretchen and Tiger Lily & Ruckus) are having a better birthday than me - please stop by their bloggies to wish them a super Happy Birthday!